Respect starts at home. Parents are the introduction of authority in a child's life. If you drop the ball in teaching them respect then they will neglect to respect others...their title and age. They will grow up believe that they are equal to others older than them and treat them as such and feel a sense of entitlement.
In this clip Ms. Angelou had to teach the young adult that first of all...you are not my friend. You just met me personally for the first time today. Etiquette teaches that you address a person by their Title (Ms, Mrs., Miss or Mr) and their last name until they tell you otherwise. Otherwise you are being disrespectful to them and not honoring them. If you do not know their last name then Ms or Sir will be proper. Not old skool, yo, wat up dude. This shows to this person that your parents have not done their job as a parent and you are unlearned and they will treat you as such.
In a professional setting you can simply addressing them Ms, Mam, Sir, or by their credentials Officer, Your honor, Dr., Nurse --looking at their name tag could often give you their last name or the name they prefer to be called by...but the title comes first.
Parents: teaching your children to address you when answering you Mam, Yes mam, No mam, Sir, No Sir, Yes Sir...proves that you are the person in authority.
A lot of our young mother's today believe this is a sign of them being old fashioned or for our black culture enslaved. However, this is a sign that you hold the role of mom or dad and your child has to submit to your authority not a sign of control but a level of understanding that you are someone that they must obey and respect at all times. Neglecting teaching this role difference will cause the child to believe they are equal to you and treat you as if you are the child and they are the parent. We see this early in the talking stage with our 1-3year old children. This is because all you tell them is no, stop, quit, so they learn short words quickly and therefore, use it in you whenever you tell them to do something they wish not to do. If you're like me this is not acceptable.
Teaching them in this age to respect your title as mom or dad by adding no mam or yes mam to their response helps you to correct the behavior later because they see you're authority and no is not a option. This helps when they are walking with you and they run off. They see that your no is more important than theirs and it's a command not a choice. Imagine telling your child to stop running because she/he is about to go into the road and they yell back no neglecting to stop and they are hit by a car. Scary, huh? That's why we must set up the rules of respecting roles and boundaries to guiding our children.
As I always say. We are not raising them to be children; we're raising the to be adults. Ms. Angelou had to stop her interview process to teach respect. That should never be. At 43 years old...it's still mam, yes mam, No mam to my mom. Not Shelia Hodges-she's my mom not my equal and my words and actions reflect that authority and seniority...but mostly that respect that she would always have in my life.
If you use profanity or go back and forth in words with your parents...retrain yourselves you are not "Honoring your Father and Mother" Matthew 19:19
Check out Ephesians 6:2 for the consequences that will result if you do not. If you are not teaching your children respect them you are shortening their days. This is not showing your children love. This in fact showing that you are selfish.
I hope this helped someone. Until we meet in the office!! Talk to you soon! Stay safe!
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